


I Really Do Love You

by lahhvzombie (itsalieri)



Category: The Smiths
Genre: !!!!!, Fluff, M/M, My First Fanfic, barely angst, cute camping fic, i guess, i hope moz and jmarr never see this, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-08
Updated: 2015-11-08
Packaged: 2018-04-30 14:41:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5167631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsalieri/pseuds/lahhvzombie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Valentines Day and Johnny thinks it's a good idea to go on a camping trip with Morrissey.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Really Do Love You

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction EVER! So beware!!! 
> 
> Posting this for my lovely snail wife, Marije! 
> 
> I hope it's not too bad! I know it's very short but there are hardly enough Marrissey fanfictions out there, so I guess a little one-shot wouldn't do any harm.

It was Morrissey’s mother who had initially conjured up the idea of a Valentine's Day camping trip. She was eager to get her son, who was still living with her, out of the house for at least a few days. Johnny was delighted to oblige her. He and his boyfriend had had a sort of falling out and he felt going on this trip would potentially revive their relationship. Betty Dwyer happily lent the keys to her old and rather crappy station wagon to her son’s boyfriend.

It took a few hours for Morrissey’s mother to finally force him into packing his belongings and getting ready for the trip. 

“Why can’t we just stay home and watch a movie, or go out to some fancy restaurant like normal people?” Morrissey complained when Johnny arrived at his house on Valentine’s Day morning.

“What do you care what normal people do? We are practically a different species!” he replied with a loving smirk.

Morrissey, visibly annoyed by Johnny’s attempt at being savvy, stubbornly pressed further. “This is so pointless! Why do I have to go?!” 

“Because you’ve been spending far too much time at home lately” Betty Dwyer intervened and emerged from the kitchen where she was baking cookies for their long drive. “C’mon honey, you need to get out of the house!” Johnny smiled at her in a silent gesture of gratitude.

Morrissey succumbed to their efforts and he reluctantly collected his duffle bag full of essentials and dragged himself into the car with his boyfriend.

Besides the sound of the car moving along the long, gray road and the occasional rustle of the pages of Morrissey’s book flipping, the drive was relatively silent. Johnny had decided on a very secluded camping area directly in the middle of the wet, tree-speckled mountains. By the time the two had reached the campground, the sun had already begun to set between the black evergreens. Morrissey had given up reading his copy of The Importance of Being Earnest because of the lack of light, and resolved to staring moodily out of the window and into the darkness. 

After Johnny parked the car, he turned and looked affectionately at his boyfriend who was wrapped up in a large quilt his mother had given him. Morrissey stared back at him with bleary eyes. God, he loved this man. The realization of just how little time they’d recently been spending together fell suddenly upon Johnny. He was glad to be finally having some alone time with his boyfriend.

“What?” Morrissey asked plainly.

Johnny smiled and reached over to push Morrissey’s glasses higher up his nose. “Nothin’. C’mon, we gotta set up the tent if we’re gonna get any sleep tonight.”

Morrissey tossed his head back and groaned in protest. “Why can’t we just sleep in the car?” he complained stubbornly. 

Johnny sighed. “C’mon Moz, what’s the point of going camping if you’re just going to stay in the car the entire time?”

“It’s not like I even wanted to go on this stupid trip in the first place!” Morrissey retorted, raising his voice slightly.

“Look, can we not start fighting about this now?” Johnny sadly pleaded in a soft voice, reaching over to hold his boyfriend’s hand. Morrissey recoiled and ripped his hand away from Johnny’s touch.

Johnny sighed and got out of the car, popping open the trunk and getting out the tent. Morrissey reluctantly stepped outside, still wrapped in his blanket, and moodily helped unload the trunk. The wind began picking up and subtly nipped at their fingertips. The campsite was virtually deserted, with the exception of a large swarm of mosquitoes and the occasional raccoon rustling in the trees. 

The two decided to set up near an already existing fire pit. Morrissey huffed and threw their bags down near a log by the campfire and took a seat. Johnny stared at his boyfriend for a while, who had pulled out a flashlight out of his bag to return to reading his book, and sighed sadly to himself. Johnny didn’t understand what was going on between the two of them. They had been dating for a few months and had had no troubles in their relationship until recently. For some reason unknown to Johnny, they had begun to grow somewhat distant. Morrissey had stopped spending time with him and they no longer held hands or kissed each other casually. He knew Morrissey could sometimes be a bit overly-dramatic at times, but this was different. Johnny couldn’t even remember the last time they said those three special words to each other: “I love you.” Was he doing something wrong? Was he not adequate? Was Morrissey questioning their relationship?

A strong wind forced Johnny out of his thoughts and he began to construct the tent solemnly. “Why don’t you make us a fire?” Johnny suggested politely to Morrissey, who clearly wanted nothing to do with the construction of the tent. 

Morrissey reluctantly put his things down, with the exception of the quilt he had wrapped around his slender frame, and walked around their campground in search of dry wood and kindle for the fire. Before long, the men were surrounded by an aura of toasty orange light. Remarkably, Johnny had figured out how to set up the tent, despite never having done so before during the duration of his life, and finished by setting up the pair’s sleeping bags.

Not wanting to upset Morrissey even more, Johnny sat his tired body on the log next to his boyfriend’s and they both stared into the blazing embers together in silence.  
“Moz…” Johnny began hesitantly, after what seemed like hours. He knew they needed to talk but he struggled to form the right words that were scrambled inside his head. “Are things okay… between us, I mean?” Johnny’s eyes looked up and met with Morrissey’s, which reflected the flickering firelight. Johnny tried to search for any indication of the other man’s feelings in his face. 

“What do you mean?” Morrissey drove on, despite knowing quite well the issue he was addressing. He took his thick-framed glasses off and began to inspect them in the firelight, as if they were suddenly the most interesting pair in the world.

Johnny looked down at the hands clasped in his lap. “Moz… things just don’t feel like they used to. Have I done something wrong?” Johnny’s voice was tender but firm. “Do you want to break up?”

Morrissey’s blue eyes widened and his breath hitched in visible shock. “Johnny, I -- No!!” The feeling of dread struck him suddenly like a lick from a leather belt and he tried to get his shaky breathing under control, but his efforts were of no avail; his eyes began to water and his bottom lip quaked. “I’m sorry I’ve been acting so stupid lately!” Morrissey put his hands to his face and his shrunken form started to tremble, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me!!” he said in a small whimper. 

“C’mere babe.” Without any hesitation, Johnny moved over to where his boyfriend was seated and embraced the small, shaking body into his own skeleton-thin arms. He rubbed his back in small, soothing circles and rocked them both back and forth as his lover continuously babbled a concoction of incoherent apologies and self-degradations. “Shh, it’s okay baby,” Johnny whispered into his ear repeatedly until the man began to calm down. 

Morrissey pulled away slightly, evidently embarrassed, and rubbed his tear-stained face. He had never broken down like this in front of anyone before, not since he was a child. Johnny lifted up a hand to Morrissey’s blotchy face and rubbed his thumb across his wet cheeks. Morrissey swallowed the constricting lump in his throat and took a deep breath. “Johnny… I love you so much, more than words can say! I just -- I can’t help but wonder: What are you doing here with me?” He put his hand against the hand Johnny had placed on his face and gingerly intertwined their fingers. “You’re too good for me, Johnny! You should be with someone worthy of your love, not someone like me. I am so futile compared to you and it’s killing me to know that I’m holding you down. Johnny, I'm so sorry for --” His words were suddenly cut off by warm, cigarette-flavored lips smashing themselves into his own. For a few moments he froze before his brain was finally able to process what was happening. His eyes fluttered shut and he returned the kiss with equal strength and heat. They stayed like this, returning each other’s kisses passionately, as if they might not ever see the other again, until Johnny broke away to catch his breath. He stared at his boyfriend with dark, lustful eyes.

“Don't ever talk about yourself like that!" Johnny said between quick breaths, "You don't bring me down; you're the only thing keeping me upright. There is no other person I'd rather spend my time with than you. I love you so much, Moz, and nothing you say or do will ever make me think otherwise, okay?” He pecked his boyfriend on the cheek and repeated his request for confirmation, “Okay?”

Morrissey sighed, and looked away shyly. “Yeah...” 

"Look at me, you're perfect Moz!" His piercing blue eyes slowly made their way back up to Johnny's soft golden-brown gaze. "I hope you know how much you mean to me," he continued, "Frankly, I have no clue where I'd be without you right now -- probably playing in some rundown pub in the middle of nowhere. That day I knocked on your front door changed my life forever. I'll be the first to admit this but I'm pretty damn well sure that I fell in love with you the moment you swung that door open. Don't think, even for a second, that I would ever leave you for someone else. Absolutely no one is better than the person I'm with now! You make me so happy, Moz, and I love you boundlessly! So please, please, please! no more beating yourself up over this nonsense." Johnny saw tears begin to emerge again from Morrissey's beautiful eyes and gave him a small, affectionate smile and intertwined their fingers, which were cold and stiff from the cold. “C’mon babe, let’s get in the tent, it's getting chilly,” he said, giving Morrissey another small peck on the forehead before the pair rose to their feet and strolled over to the tent in each other’s arms in comfortable silence.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for enduring it all the way through!!!!!!!!! I hope it wasn't too bad. I'm thinking about adding more to this (maybe a sex scene??? moz would be so disappointed in me for thinking about this, sorry dad :o), message me on tumblr if you think I should @lahhvzombie :D thanks again mozphiles! this truly means so much to me!!


End file.
